


Lost in Autumn

by UnderworId



Category: Original Work
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-26
Updated: 2019-10-26
Packaged: 2021-01-03 10:37:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 754
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21178043
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UnderworId/pseuds/UnderworId
Summary: Wrong dream.





	Lost in Autumn

**Author's Note:**

> Be kind, always.

It was the crushing sound I make as I crunch the dried leaves lay on the dusty road. That made me pause and listen to the quietness of the lonely park. 

I followed the passe of the blowing wind as it plays with my long wavy hair. I lazily sat on one of the wooden bench under an old maple tree and near a small bronze fountain. As the wind continuous to sing the branches sways and the water splashing. Dried leaves began to fall, hundreds. They fall on the ground. I can’t take it anymore, the pain. _“Not fair…”_ I squirmed. Talking exactly to no one. My body gave up, it can’t suppress the emotion. It began to weep. Teardrops start to fall, like it was mimicking the falling leaves. I was left accompanied by frustration. ‘Why now… why you…?’ the questions that are filling and invading my mind. 

Why him? 

He who I met not long ago. He who I make friends with, who look at me as a friend only a friend, and he who I’ve learned to understand and whom I’ve fallen in love with. Another batch of tears fell as I hold my mouth to cry quietly. My heart pounding faster as I feel the air evacuating my lungs. I gasp, inhaling more and faster. Followed by electricity flowing inside my skin, the unquenched burning of my heart, blades falling and slashing my sanity. These exaggerate my feeling of longing hoping and loving. 

Now I was left… haggard. 

Can’t coup up with anything at all. The sun was hiding in the clouds but there is no sign of incoming rain at all. The gold fishes splashing and squirting the waters in the fountain. The leaves quietly hitting the ground and as it was dragged away by the moderate wind. A couple of small birds chirping as they fly pass me. The sounds so calming and soothing. A perfect scenario ruined by my sobbing. Nature against me. This was not written on my schedule this cloudy Friday afternoon. I’m not supposed to act like this, but love is my only weakness. If only someone can hear my silent cries, my little prayers, the never-ending dreaming. 

Am I chasing the  wrong dream? 

Did I turn into a dead-end corner? 

Is there a trap waiting to eat me? 

Is this a punishment? 

Why should I be the one suffering. If my whole world will be shattered this might be the reason. Envy those people who find each other locked, safe and warm in their lover’s arms. Finding comfort and security in their words. Reading the love flowing from each caress. Proud when they promised forever through their eyes. _“Oh, stop this thing…”_ I declaim, while trembling. 

These things where nothing to me before I started  to fall for him. It catches me unaware when the blind arrow of cupid hit me, I don’t know how or why and most certainly I didn’t see it coming. Now that I’m down on my knees and surrender from the agony. I wiped my tears as I exhaled heavily the last time. I took out a small mirror from my handbag and look at my reflection. Frowning a little as I gaze upon the girl in the mirror looking at me. 

I hate her weakness and her strengths. I returned the mirror to my purse and out my perfume was. I sprayed it around me, then I combed my hair and arranged my dress. 

This was all for him. 

This very day I’m going to meet him. Now, in this place, this time. I suddenly swing my head as I heard footsteps coming toward me. I stand up, a little smile escaped my lips. My heart started to rush again as I stretched my arms guiding my guest to sit beside me. He followed, relaxed. I again catch my breath as I sit and looked at him. Assuming he’ll listen and understand. 

_ “Hey, what is it that you want to talk about?“ _

He started just as I’m about to speak gibberish because of the butterflies in my stomach. He catches me right there again, like he always does or never knew he was doing. This time I made up my mind and there is no turning back now. I squished my fist and looked at him in the eye. I opened my mouth and let the words get out as they wish. He stared at me as he waits. I lean closer and told him _“I…“_

**Author's Note:**

> Collections of short stories written way back in 2008.
> 
> Thanks for spending time with me.


End file.
